The Unbreakable Boundaries Program
Learn to listen, hear, and see yourself: Live YOUR life
Boundaries with people in addiction are complicated
Here are some things to consider:
Guilt will drive your decisions until you learn the value of healthy boundaries, which provide a structure for healing.
Maybe you don't have the facts you need to set effective boundaries.
Too many people may be giving you unsolicited advice to a situation they have no clue about and it's contradicting and confusing.
What works for some, may not work for you
There are no blanket solutions
Language matters, maybe a simple tweak in wording can change the outcome dramatically
How do you know what to do when:
Your loved one gets arrested?
They are hinting at suicide? Or flat out telling you they are going to kill themselves?
You start seeing money missing from your wallet? Or you are much further along in them stealing from you and all your tools, TV, Jewelry, etc are gone?
You know they are lying to you, but you have no evidence?
They can't seem to really hear anything you are saying to them?
You're in a vicious cycle of things getting better then things getting worse again?
You get so sick and tired of having to stop everything you're doing to go clean up their mess?
They have wrecked yet another car you bought them so they could get to and from work?
They say they are going to work, but they never seem to have money?
Your boundaries seem to be constantly getting stomped on?
They are in the hospital for the THIRD freaking overdose, as if one wasn't enough to wake them up.
We aren't taught how to deal with this stuff...until now
Watch this video to see to learn even more about the program and what it will do for you
Feeling like you are lost in knowing how to help your loved one?
It can be so hard to know what to do or what to say to your loved one. Does it seem like everytime you open your mouth, it's either like talking to a wall or a argument breaks out? Do you feel like you are getting pulled in several different directions to the point you say to yourself "I really don't have time to worry about this."?
Save yourself years of frustration, time, and money in a few short weeks.
Addiction is like being in a foreign country
Addiction (or trauma related substance abuse) operates under a different set of rules, but the rules are predictable if you know the language and how it operates. But you need a guide, a road map so to speak. The boundary setting program does just that. It gives you the road map to setting effective boundaries that work!
It also goes into details about WHY certain boundaries don't work and what you have to do to ensure success. There is so much to setting effective boundaries.
WANT TO HEAR FROM SOMEONE WHO HAS GONE THROUGH THE PROGRAM AND WHAT HER BIG INSIGHTS WERE? LISTEN TO THIS PODCAST INTERVIEW.
Setting effective boundaries is essential to their well being and yours.
How do you set clear expectations?
How do you know what to expect from a seemingly unpredictable world?
Why do you keep ending up breaking your own rules?
How do you love them unconditionally and support them, without crossing the line into enabling?
The program answers all these questions and more
Outline of the program
This program is a eight week program. The first five weeks are with videos which we will be discussing more in depth with each of our calls together. Below is what the video series looks like and the core of the foundation you are building to support yourself for years after.
Overview of the program
This first video goes through the overview of the program and some key factors into why boundaries sometimes don't work and what you need to think about as you are setting your boundaries. There are a lot of things to work on first before actually setting boundaries.
There are simply areas where we don't know what we don't know. Addiction is something we don't automatically understand. There are places where we can find ourselves in denial, it's important to know how to break free from denial so we can set effective boundaries by having more of the facts.
Assess your Situation
Most people with substance abuse have trauma. How do you handle that? What are some financial considerations? What are some of the patterns you are witnessing in them? When you try to tell them something, do they misinterpret what you are saying? Do they seem to get angry every time you try to talk to them? How can you pierce through their drug/alcohol haze and reach them? This section focuses on how to get them to respond differently.
Commit to yourself
Boundaries are a commitment. They can make you feel uncomfortable sometimes, but how can you commit to being uncomfortable when you know you are doing the right thing? This section goes through how to commit to yourself and to them free of guilt and shame. We are not doing anything TO them, we are doing everything FOR them.
This section goes through how to limit reactive boundaries and how to set proactive boundaries with clear expectations and guidelines for your loved one. Language is important, we go through how to language boundaries and formulate solid, effective, unbreakable boundaries.
Tough love is essential, but it doesn't mean you have to be tough on them. It means you will have to make decisions that are tough to do. But you are making those decisions out of love, compassion, and faith. Showing love is action oriented. They need to know you believe in them and that you are there for them no matter what, but you will not enable their poor behaviors. You are showing love for yourself and for them. I don't know of any parent that wants to turn their back on their own child, and you don't have to.